Teaching your Baby Sign Language

When my daughter, India, was just a few months old, we began to teach her American Sign Language and Mandarin Chinese.  I still use a little Chinese with her, but wasn't confident enough in my language skills, so that's on the back burner. 

We focused more on American Sign Language (ASL).  We don't have anyone close to us who is hard of hearing or uses ASL, but we knew that any extra language development would only accentuate her mind.  Why not use one that encouraged early communication, is shown to help children how to read, and is practical as it's the third most common language in America?

We have primarily used Baby Signing Time and Signing Time DVDs to learn ASL.  Most of the time, I am around to engage in the videos too, but sometimes I do let her watch one while I make supper or start laundry. 

4 months old, India's first time watching Baby Signing Time

We started when she was around 4 months old and have gradually increased to watching three or four videos a week and then we practice them throughout the day.  While I don't normally walk around in the store using only signs to communicate, I do use them here and there publicly.  At home we use them a lot.  If I don't know a sign, I just omit it and sign the words I do know. 

My very favorite story was when India was maybe 11 months old.  She would kind of hug herself.  I wasn't as aware of the fact that she was possibly communicating to me, so I just thought she was being cute.  One day, I put it together, she was signing 'baby'!  She had been signing it for months but I never caught on!  She had been trying to tell me about her baby!  I realized at that time there were several other signs that she using, but I just wasn't paying attention.

That being said, her signs aren't perfect.  Obviously, her fine motor skills are developing, so some signs don't look exactly like they're supposed to.  It's OK, though.  I still understand what she is communicating and sign the correct sign back to her.

India getting Signing Time DVDs for her 1st Birthday

At 17 months of age, India is able to use about 50 signs in their proper context and can understand many more than that.  In addition to her spoken language, it has really enhanced communication, starting at about 10 months.  She can almost always communicate her needs with me, which is a blessing for BOTH of us.  There are some words she says that she no longer signs, but there are some words that she only signs.  Sometimes I only sign to her, which is a really nice thing if we're somewhere that she needs to be quiet!

As her spoken language develops more and more, we will still continue with ASL.  I had several students in my grade who used ASL to communicate and I always wished I would've been able to talk with them more.  If India continues to learn ASL, if she is ever in a situation like that, hopefully that ASL she has acquired will help her form relationships with others she never would've been able to communicate with otherwise.

It's never to late to learn another language.  Never!  It only benefits one's mind to be used in such a capacity, no matter the age.  If someone is 2 or 11 or 36 or 97, it's never too late!  

Do your children know a second language?  Have you ever wanted to learn another language?

Eleven

You're 11 months old today, Pook.  I cannot believe you are that old.

Happy 11 months, India Josephine!

Every stage with you has been so fun!  And mostly everyday with you has been so rewarding.

You are still intense, determined, love attention, vocal and sweet.

You really, really, really like me.  Sometimes I love it, sometimes it breaks me down.

You love to share your food!  Speaking of food, you are getting quite picky.  Strawberries, watermelon, bananas are all things you will no longer eat. Mama's not too happy about that, but hopefully it's just a phase.

You say Mama, Dada, hi, ohh! and ohh?, 'ta sat?' (meaning, what's that?), and a version of 'who's that?', 'Ayyy' (Yay) and 'Na na na na na na na na na' when you don't want to do something.  You also have a fake laugh and a fake cough and you love to entertain people with both!

You still charm everyone, winning over everyone with your smile and your cute waving to say hi or goodbye.  You give kisses and cuddles to those you are really close with. 

Your Daddy and I sit and watch you and laugh as you mimic us, tease us, chase us and show off.  The only toys you play with is your Baby, Sophie the Giraffe and balls. 

You clap after you are praised, you give high fives, and love to point to things when asked where they are.  Your favorite things to point to is Mama's eyes, nose and mouth and the lights!  You understand some words in Chinese - yogurt, water, breastfeeding, dog, cat, phone, kiss, eat, apple and ball. 

You still have our hearts and we'd do anything for you. 

It feels like just yesterday you were nestling into my neck, making newborn baby noises, so soft and sweet. I can't believe in one month, you will celebrate your first year of life.  My heart aches and beams with joy all at the same time.

Thank you for teaching us how to love deeper, Pooka.  You have no idea how much you mean to us...

39 Weeks!

Before I begin, don't forget to enter the giveaway for Chewbeads!!

My daughter is now 39 weeks old, and as of today, nine months old!  I still love her just as much and even more than I did nine months ago!

I thought about the last time India was 39 weeks or 9 months old, when I was 39 weeks pregnant, and didn't have very fond thoughts.  I know some women sail through pregnancy with very few problems and love being pregnnt, but for whatever reason, the curse of Eve was hard on me. 

Before I got pregnant, I considered becoming a surrogate, and would still consider it, but with more careful consideration because I now know how much work is involved with growing a little person.

It wasn't easy: nausea my entire pregnancy, horrible swelling, hips that twisted out of place (seeing the chiropractor every other day at the end otherwise I wasn't able to walk), and the worse thing of all, PUPPP.

I tried not to complain over the course of my entire pregnancy, being grateful and trying to cherish every minute.  In fact, only 3 or 4 people knew that I had PUPPP, because I was so worried about complaining, that I didn't like people to know anything was wrong! 

It wasn't until I gave birth that I said, "OH MY GOODNESS, THAT WAS MISERABLE"!   India was worth it, but I'm SO glad that we're on the other side now, as this is much, much, much easier!

Surely, holding a yummy-smelling, squishy, baby like this...

...is better than 9 months of sickness.

And this little coo alone was worth...

...ridiculous swelling!



These kissable cheeks and cheesy smile...

...was much more desirable than PUPPP.

To say I'm thankful that India is now here and not ^^there^^ is an understatement.

I know to get to these nine months, I had to go through those nine months - and I am thankful for every day and every moment as painful as they were. 

How did your body handle being pregnant?  Would you consider surrogacy?

New Years Resolutions 2011

*I had this all ready to post on New Years, but with my Grandpa passing, I waited until now.  I hope you don't mind. :-)

Most people dislike New Years Resolutions. Why?  Well, mainly for two reasons. 

One, they don't want to conform to the general idea.  They don't want to be counted with the average person.  The idea of being an individual resonates with me in many other areas, but with New Years Resolutions, I'm ready to comply with the rest of society.

Secondly, they don't like the feeling of failure.  I think that is the most common reason.  Let me tell you - this recovering perfectionist understands!

Every year, around Thanksgiving, I begin to think about my goals for the upcoming year. 

Then, I set my New Years Resolutions and every year I fail at them.  I don't think I've ever succeeded in one.  Some of them over the years have been, but are not limited to:

• Working out
• Journaling
• Spending time reading the Bible daily
• Learn a new vocabulary word everyday (this was actually quite difficult)
• Keep my house clean (this was even MORE difficult)
• Write one snail mail letter or thank you a week
• Stop cussing (Ha, normally, just a few short months later I try to give this up for lent)

But I'm not defeated by my failures.  They served their time and purpose, and at least got me thinking (some of them months in advance) about areas in my life that I would like to see change. 

SO...

You want to know what this year's resolutions are?  Of course you do, that's why you're reading!

• Blog regularly.  I haven't decided on a "set" number of blog posts a month, but I do with to blog more often than last year.  Which shouldn't be hard considering I blogged more in the last four months of 2010 than I did in the previous eight combined.
• Shop less at Walmart!  I wish I could give up Walmart totally, but the cheap prices, oh the cheap prices.  And yes, I know why they are so cheap, and that is why I'm convicted to shop there less.  Instead, support WAHM (work at home moms) & their gorgeous creations, local businesses, and companies that help society, not hurt it. 
• Journal, journal and journal.  I love all my old journals, they are precious to me.  I have really neglected my personal journal since falling pregnant with India.  I also have a journal for her that I write in - milestones, notes of love, encouragement.  Someday, I want it to be filled with stories of her.
• Get rid of crap in my house.  You know what happens when you move from an apartment to a house? You get crap, and fill that house full of it.  Unless you are Salena or Vanessa  - then you don't.  I want to get rid of about a quarter of my stuff.  I mean, my baby can't even crawl yet, and my basement is full of toys for her!  And all the boxes of stuff I've been planning on selling on eBay?  Hello, garage sale.
• Stop being so mean to my husband.  I'm not always mean, but my husband is pretty sensitive, so I have to be careful how I say things.  I can be abrupt, and that hurts him.  I'm pretty curt or frank with him (whichever man you prefer lol!), and I need to pad my words more.  I've been working on this one for a while too.  *sigh*  I really am a work in progress.
• Make more of our stuff from GOOD products.  Clothes and accessories for India, window coverings, meals made from whole foods, more garden produce, homemade yogurt, sprouted bread, etc.

Ahhh, 2011 Resolutions are set!  Actually, maybe not set, because I love to add an extra one here or there.

Do you make New Years Resolutions?  If you do, what are they?  Have you ever stuck with any of your resolutions?

Here's to a new week

Last week wasn't very fun.  I'm going to get a bit whiny & negative here - I'm sorry, I really am.  I don't like to be negative or selfish or have little pity parties, but sometimes I do all of those thing.  And I'm inviting you to my pity party right now! :-)

Last Thursday is when my good attitude crumbled.

We've only had one car for about a month and a half, which Dallas has because he works all the time. I mostly work from home, and because he is always going here and there for work, it just makes it easier to let him have it.  I've been fine not going anywhere, for DAYS at a time, even almost a week at a time, but this week, in addition to other circumstances, it began to catch up with me.  I've pretty much said no to all social outings for a while now, because I hate being dependant on others for rides.  My only solace was that Dallas was going to be going out of town for a few days, which would leave me with the car!


Also, India was whiny and fussy and crabby and "talking back" for a few days.  Please God, let it be teeth, or I'm ordering an exorcism, stat.  This isn't normal for my usually happy little girl.


I was also having one of those everyone has a cuter hairstyle, cuter face, cuter clothes, cuter life than me days and feeling yucky.  You know, kind of how you feel when you have your period.  Except I didn't have mine.


India has also been battling some diaper rash, which made me feel like a crap mom.  Through the process of elimination I was trying to figure the cause.  Her rash would clear up, but the second anything else touched it, the rash appeared again.  It was defeating.  The only good thing about it was that she used the potty all day and only wet her diapers during nap!  Yay for no diapers!


So I spent most of Thursday, with a crying baby, frustated with diaper rash, and really sick of never getting out of the house, when my list of errands/Christmas shopping/any excuse to leave was just getting longer. 


I felt overwhelmed.

And so I cried (the first of many cries).


Then we got word that something we were counting on financially, panned out to be nugatory.  This was what really pushed me over the edge, because as much as I had tried not to, I was counting on this working out. And let's be honest, finances are really tight right now.  We're pretty much hanging in the red.  And I cried again.  I think this one got me cussing too.  I can't really remember because there was SO much emotion in 24 hours.  But I was REALLY upset about this one.

I also found out that I was going to probably be losing two of my piano students.  I only take a handful of students, so when I lose two, that's a big chunk of my income. More much needed money lost.


Then Dallas had to make a trip out of town Thursday night to go and get a temporary license for our new-to-us car that is waiting for us to pick it up in Arizona.  Dallas drove out there at 11pm (he's a busy guy) to get the license.  I woke up at 2am and realized Dallas wasn't in bed and FREAKED out.  My phone was full of missed alerts, and I instantly knew what had happened.  I found Dallas in the living room, afraid to tell me that the only car in our possession was sitting on the side of the road, broke down (Progressive said we didn't have roadside assistance -they lied, we did.  But THEY finally figured that out after Dallas had arranged a ride home). 


Then I really lost it.


Crying. Thought I was going to puke.  Sweating.  More crying.  Shaking.  More thinking I was going to throw up.


I *might* have overreacted.  But it was 2-something in the morning and I was just awakened from a deep sleep.  A sleep I really needed after the drama I had stirred all day.


Then it hit me.  Dallas was going to be leaving for Arizona, and I was counting on the car during that time.  The car was going to get me out of the house, whenever I wanted.  I could get Christmas shopping done, I could browse the Target clearance inside aisles, and I could grocery shop.  I could maybe even make it to my mom's to work. 


But no, instead, it was sitting on the side of some road, waiting to be towed, and given an expensive diagnosis.  Car problems wouldn't be the end of the world, except we've put more into this car than I care to disclose.  But we needed to get from Point A to Point B.


And all that meant I wouldn't have a car while Dallas was gone.


By this point I was hysterical.  And really overtired. 


I had planned a fun date with one of my girlfriends Friday morning, a date that both she & I needed, but now I was going to have to cancel it because we would be in the middle of trying to tow our car somewhere (remember, Progressive didn't think we had roadside assistance, but we did. I'm not bitter.  Really.  I'm not.)  and arrange rides.


More tears.


Then I started thinking about how now we have to get two new-to-us cars.  We can't afford two new cars.  We've lived without a car payment for almost 9 years, and we've lived without one because we can't afford even one!  It hit me then that we will now have two car payments. 


And while we're waiting to buy a 2nd car, I will still be carless.  I can't work my other job, and therefore I can't make money to even buy another car.  And we all know what sort of salary youth pastor's make.


I also started questioning if our new car in AZ, which we bought sight unseen, was going to be a bust too - like I felt everything else was at that moment.


UGH.


The good news is whoever buys our old car will have a like-new car.  New fuel pump, timing belt, water pump, etc, etc, etc.  It's not good news for our wallet, but we want it to be in good condition when we sell it.


My day did get better though.


I fell asleep praying, and woke up with a better attitude. 


Our car got towed, and we made it back in town so I could go out with my friend!


Then my parents told me I could use their soon-to-be for sale Denali while Dallas was in AZ so I could have a car!  And an all wheel drive one at that!


Dallas saw someone he knows at a gas station who had the same car as the one we are buying in AZ.  Dallas talked to this guy for a while and got to see his car - the exact model as ours.  Dallas felt that God was reassuring us that it was going to be alright. 


As we drove around that day, using different vehicles for different things, we both concluded that we are blessed. 

It's just a car. 

It's just diaper rash. 

It's just Christmas shopping. 

At least we have each other, our health and many friends who helped us out and encouraged us for those hours that we were lagging.

Here's to a new week, and a new attitude!

Process of Forgiveness, Part 2

Remember a few weeks ago, I posted this blog post? 

A brief recap: I was having a hard time forgiving someone who had said some hurtful things to me several months ago.  I thought I had forgiven that person, but one morning as I thought about them and felt frustration and anger, God told me that I was still in the process of forgiveness with them & really needed to reconcile.

Here is an update.
This person and I got together and talked, finally!  We were both nervous; she was afraid I was going to yell at her and I was afraid she was going to hurt me more.  THANKFULLY, none of that happened!!! 

We talked and shared ... honestly.

She explained that she was in a difficult situation during that time and didn't mean what was said and it was misunderstood.  And I knew that things were stressful for her at that time and that her comments probably stemmed from that - not towards me or India. 

Praise God for forgiveness and reconcilition!!! When I think of this person now, there is absolutely NO hard feelings at all! 

It's such a great feeling.

As grateful as I am that forgiveness doesn't have to happen overnight, it sure is a great feeling when the poisonous weight of bitterness and frustration is unharnassed from my back.

"If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone."

Romans 12:18

I took a chance, and saw a miracle

Do you ever have one of those God moments, where you know that you know that you know, that you are supposed to do something, but it may be a little embarrassing or a lot bit awkward?

I've had a lot of those moments.  For some reason, God likes to pick on me, and routinely chooses me to take part in those uncomfortable times. 

Like the time when I felt like I was supposed to empty out my wallet for a lady shopping in a store. She was dressed nicely and I was sure I was going to offend her.  Turns out, she was trying to buy stuff for her child and didn't have enough money to buy the things she needed. 

Or the time when a girl was telling me some deep stuff, the kind of stuff that needed deep healing, and I felt like I was supposed to hold her and sing over her?  Awkward.  I did it anyways, and she just cried.  Later, my husband was informed by her mom that this girl felt healing during that time and profusely thanked me for doing that.

The list goes on....I don't do these things because I suspect something, because my suspicions could be way off and I don't like to judge.  And I don't do them because they make me feel good.  I do these things because I feel led to. 

Unfortunately, I don't always follow through because of fear.  I would guess more often than not, I ignore

Well, two days ago started one of those awkward, embarrassing God moments for me.

I had seen a post on Facebook from someone that I know but I don't keep in touch with that often.  I saw he was in a relationship and of course, had to go see who this girl is.  I wasn't even a few pictures in, looking at  him and his gorgeous girlfriend, when I knew I needed to contact this girl about something very personal.

I was supposed to contact her, and just support her in this issue that God had spoken to me about.

I
was
supposed
to
contact
her.

Go out on a limb and talk to her about an issue that I didn't even know if she was dealing with.

Me, a stranger.

Her, a stranger.

This, a personal issue.

Someone who I hadn't even seen 5 minutes earlier in pictures.

GULP.

Are you kidding me, GOD???  I've got a reputation to protect here!

Some of you may be thinking right now, "I bet she was supposed to point out sin" or "I wonder if she was going to witness to her".  No, it was nothing like that.  Nothing to condemn, only to reach out and love her and let her know that I was there. 

Yeah, me, the one she doesn't even know, is here to support her.

The least qualified one.

The one behind the computer screen.

This picture-looking-Facebook-stalking happened Sunday, and on Monday I thought about her several times during the day.  I wondered how I could pull it off so she didn't think I was a creeper.  As time went on, I convinced myself more and more that I just needed to leave her alone.  I didn't know who she is.  Who am I to message her about something SO deep?  I was proabably way off anyways.  I stomped out the fire in my mind and decided that was that.  No more thoughts about contacting her.

Monday night, at about 7pm or 8pm, my husband and I took a trip to a store, and intended to be very quick.  We had a tired baby, and the weather wasn't the best, but we figured it would be a good time to go because very few people would be shopping because of the bad weather.

Let this be said: any time either my husband or I go out, it is NEVER quick.  We know way too many people, and love to talk to them all.  This is why we used to drive an hour away from home to do our grocery shopping or shop in the middle of the night because a 10 minute trip to the store equals a 30 minute trip for us.

Our trip to this store proved no different on Monday night.  We saw a couple from our old church. Then we go sidetracked with a funny family from our new church. We then ran into an old friend of mine who has been going through some difficult situations.  We easily spent an extra 40 minutes in the store talking with people - which we LOVE!

Just as we were finishing our conversations, I saw HER.  The girl that I was supposed to contact.  She was with another friend of mine. 

Convenient.

If we would have left even a few minutes earlier, or skipped one previous conversation, I would've never seen this girl.

So there I was, this girl I had NEVER heard of 24 hours earlier, was right there, in front of me, in the SAME town, with a mutual friend there to coordinate some interaction.

I saw just a few minutes of this girl, as I was mostly talking with our mutual friend. But I knew God was definite in His decision to use me in this situation.

As we left the store, I could hardly wait to get home.  But yet at the same time, I was dreading it, because now I knew for sure that God had not forgotten about this girl and He hadn't forgotten about my invovlement with her.

I sat at my computer after India went to bed and typed and thought and deleted and re-typed.  Finally, I pressed the send button, and my words to this girl, left the safety of my delete button, and were now entering her Inbox.

And just like that, I was either about to make a fool of God and myself, and this girl was going to think I was psychotic or this was going to fit perfectly in her life as a source of encouragement.

I went to bed, wondering if some girl, who I didn't even know, was reading a message from me about perhaps one of the most personal areas in her life.  I wondered what she was feeling. 

When I woke up this morning and checked my messages, you cannot imagine the joy I felt when I saw my inbox contained a lengthy message from her, detailing some issues in her life right now, including the issue that I felt I was supposed to talk with her about.  YAY!! I'm not so crazy! :-)

She spoke of how this is quite possibly the craziest thing that has ever happened to her, but she feels like God is reaching out to her, through me, as she sits in some dark depths of despair.

To me, that is a miracle.

I am not bragging about me.  Trust me.  I wanted nothing to do with this at first.  Remember, I didn't contact her for about 24 hours, out of fear?  I was scared and afraid that I had it all wrong.  Or that she would reject me.  Or that I would get labeled a psycho or creeper or intruder. 

Really, this is ALL about God and this beautiful girl.  I just happen to be caught in the midst of it.  And I'm SO GLAD that I am. 

I don't wish to be anywhere else than next to someone, even a stranger, as they walk through dark, messy, heart-wrenching issues.  Because I know what it's like to be there.

Today, God has used the normal me, in a unique way.  Or maybe it's the other way around.  Maybe this is the "normal" way, and it's not so unique after all. 

Maybe we should be taking chances, and seeing miracles. 

Maybe that's the norm. 

How does God want to use you in a normal way today?  Do you ever have "those moments"?

Process of Forgiveness

I'm normally one who forgives and even forgets pretty quickly. I HATE conflict, and would much rather live at peace. I don't like to stir up controversy. Even though I do have opinions that I share in person and on this blog, I do it because I want to share my heart, not frustrate anyone.

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times should I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?"

Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times".

Matthew 18:21-22

I used to read these verses and think about forgiving someone more that 7 times, or 77 times, or 777 times, or as many times as they hurt or offended me, thinking in the context of separate offenses. But maybe this verse is to be thought of as one offense, and you forgive that person 7 times, or 77 times or 777 times, just for that one offense. Maybe forgiveness is a process.

How many times do we think of a time when someone has hurt us, and maybe we have forgiven them, but it still stings?

Or we think poorly of them when their name is mentioned?

Or we walk the other way when we see them in the hallway at church because things are just awkward?

Perhaps that is unforgiveness.

I think that's the example Jesus is talking about here. Everytime we remember an offense, maybe 2 times, maybe 400 times, we need to forgive and forgive and forgive and forgive that ONE offense...because quite often, it is still impacting us.

In sharing my heart, I recently realized that I've been struggling with forgiving someone. I normally get over things pretty quickly, but this has been very difficult for me. Someone in my life was upset that I was having a baby and said some hurtful things about not being able to love my daughter, and talked of anger and hatred towards me and my daughter. Of course, this hurt deep, but also infuriated me. My natural response was not love and forgiveness!

And some days, it still isn't.

I can handle being put down, or people not liking or loving me, but it sure is a lot harder when it's your child, who was innocently born into this.

I know this person is hurting deeply to say those things. Hurting people hurt people.

This morning I realized how much unforgiveness still broods in me when I thought about seeing this person in for future events. I know that I need to try to reconcile in person before more bitterness sweeps in. It won't be an easy task. I will definitely have some very serious things to say, I won't mince words, even though I intend to be kind, but firm and honest.

I'm not saying "forgiveness is forgetting" or letting someone "get away with it" - because it most of the time, it's not.

I know I have forgiven this person tens of times, and have even thought I was "over it". But then this morning, all these emotions came back over me and God spoke to me about how I'm not over it and it still hurts and I need to continue to forgive.

I may feel hurt for a long time, and I may have to forgive hundreds of more times. Am I willing to do that for the sake of relationship and to prevent my own heart from being corroded?

All that I know is that I want to be a woman of grace, love, wisdom and forgiveness. And when I say hurtful things to someone else, and I do, knowingly and unknowingly, I hope others will forgive me over and over and over and over and over and over again - just as I intend to do with this person who has hurt me.

The last thing I want to do is leave a trail of bitterness.

Renewed

Oh, my poor blog has been abandoned yet again! I'm so sorry Bloggie, and so sorry to my faithful few readers. I'm determined to be more dedicated. Until summer comes back. :)

Why haven't I blogged? Well, my husband, baby & I all boarded a plane for San Diego where we attended the National Youth Workers Convention. Our time at the convention was incredible! Some of the nation's leading youth speakers came and spoke. Great worship bands like Robbie Seay Band and Starfield led in worship and we spent a lot of time listening and processing all the information we tried to receive in about four days. We were challenged, refreshed, renewed, and spoken to. Sometimes, when you are in ministry, the best way to receive is to go away from your town and glean without all the pressures of the job following you. Thank you to all who prayed for us, encouraged us, and made it possible for us to go!

After San Diego, we roadtripped to my husband's aunt and uncle in Palm Springs and spent a couple of days strolling this beautiful town, talking about more ministry ideas we had, spending time with Dallas' aunt and uncle, and relaxing by their pool. After that we made our way to Las Vegas to again see more of Dallas' family. Most of our time in Vegas was spent with them, which was great! Dallas' uncle and aunt used to live in Denver when we lived in Colorado Springs, so quite often we would see eachother. It was so fun to spend time with them again! Also, I didn't know some of Dallas' aunts and uncles that well before the trip, but spending a few days with them was a great way to get to know each other. We also went down to the Strip and saw all the beautiful casinos, lights, and took in as much free entertainment as we could! We also saw the magnificent Hoover Dam!


We've been back for almost 2 weeks, but are still glowing from this time! India was a good little traveler, thank God! She doesn't do well in cars, which we knew because she never has, so that got a little frustrating. If parents are at their wits end with a crying child, many will pop them in the carseat and drive around for a bit until they calm down or fall asleep. NOT my little girl. You put her in the carseat, and she starts "talking back" pretty quick. She hates being alone (yes, two parents who love people had a daughter that loves people) and she hates not being able to see anything. If you would have passed us while we were driving around, quite often, you would have seen me manuveuring my way from the front seat to the back seat in our squishy little economy rental car, all to speak a few words of comfort to my baby girl. But she made up for it with her angelic behavior on both flights and her love, interest and smile for every person we met.

Overall, we came away from our trip realizing that as important as ministry is, we need to make sure we have family time - easier said than done, when your husband is a youth pastor, and when do most things happen with youth? After school. It's when they are wanting to chat on Facebook, when they send messages, when they have football games, when most youth events are. Many speakers spoke on protecting that sacred time, something that we need to work on. God also spoke to us overwhelmingly on love. It sounds so cliche, and sometimes we look down on and judge the "love messages" as elementary, but really, are any of us above being reminded of our loving, forgiving Father? I don't think so. And if we think we are, we have lost the beauty of the cross.

My one-month-old World Changer

To my dear little India,

Happy One Month Birthday my precious one! I can hardly believe that it's been one month since we officially met. In some ways it feels like you've always been a part of our lives, and sometimes, when I close my eyes, I can still feel your warm, slippery newly birthed body. And it feels like that just happened a few minutes ago. You have already changed so much. Sometimes that makes me cry and I get anxious at the thought of you growing up too quickly, but I know the Lord is good, and this is how He has designed it.

I want you to know that I loved you completely from the moment I knew I was pregnant with you. From before I could feel you tapping inside of me, before I knew what you looked like, or if there was anything "wrong" or "right" with you, before I knew you were a little girl, before I first looked into your eyes - I have loved you completely. I still love you my India, although now, it is different. My love for you is deeper than it was for you one month ago, and I'm sure one month now it will be even more exquisite. My love for you is pure and intoxicating. I love the smell of your head and your breath, the softness of your skin, the look of admiration in your eyes as we stare at each other for hours. I could kiss you all day long!

Your Daddy and I are so delighted that God chose you, for us. We have felt completely unworthy at times to be your caregivers, overwhelmed by the responsibility of raising you to be a blessing to this world. Please have grace with us, and forgive us our failures, as this is a learning and growing process for all of us. We are trying so hard.

We want nothing more than to watch you grow up, a secure, confident little girl, with a tender heart. We want you to see our love and commitment to each other, to you, to the lost and hurting in this world, and to God.

India, you are absolutely beautiful and altogether lovely. I've spent time at the Pyramids at Giza, the Great Wall of China, the Taj Mahal, been awed by famous mountains and mountain ranges, been humbled by the Ganges, Mekong, Thames, Nile, and Yangtze rivers, gone on safaris, trekked in jungles and deserts, watched sunrises and sunsets all over the world, walked on pristine land that was virtually untouched by man, seen volcanoes erupting, have seen many seas and oceans. All of these things that are considered some of the most amazing experiences anyone can take in. But, my sweet little girl, NONE of it is as breathtaking, inspiring, beautiful or heart-moving as you are.

Thank you for being my daughter; I'm so proud to be your Mama. I love you.