Slow and Gracious

I'm realizing more and more about God's comapassionate father heart through my pregnancy, and I'm amazed at how He is slow and gracious with us, not giving us more than we can handle.

While 10 months of pregnancy seems long, can you imagine if humans had the gestational period of a rabbit, 30-some days? You find out you're pregnant at the beginning of the month, then you have not one, but 10 or so little ones at the end of the month! Whew! Instead, God has been gracious with us, and gives us just the right amount of time to prepare and go through all sorts of emotional seasons as we prepare for one new addition to our families. Well, most of the time only one. :)

The idea of feeding a baby, especially from what I hear and read about those first few weeks of continual feedings, can be quite overwhelming. But if your grocery bill took a massive jump by adding a 17 year old boy to your household, and not only that but needed meals and snacks made all the time, that would be a shock to the pocketbook and your time clock! Instead, God slowly grows that baby up, allowing you build and grow with them, adjusting and preparing for their future needs.

And changing poopy diapers could, and I'm sure at many times, will be challenging and gag-worthy. But imagine if a ten year old was plopped in your lap, reeking of crap, begging YOU to change her diaper. Pretty sure I'd drop her off at Salvation Army or Goodwill. Instead, you get an 8 pound chunk of love, complete with breastfed newborn baby poop, a lot lighter on the clean-up, smell and texture. Once again, God gently breaking us in to our new role.

What if after our babies were born, they transformed into rambunctious two-year olds? Begging for independence, beginning to sass back, displaying their acrobatic skills? I think of my friend who has said her little boy didn't stop moving and running around as soon as he could walk, and how tired she was. That, makes me not want kids. Honestly. Not that a two-year old isn't beautiful and unique, but I'm not ready for THAT. Yet. That is why God gives us infants first. Slightly easier to handle physically than a two-year old. God is gracious with us, giving us a newborn that demands attention 24 hours a day with their sleep-eat-poop schedule, versus starting us off with a two-year old that demands attention 16 hours a day with their sleep-eat-BIG poop-scream-giggle-run-eat-BIG poop-tantrum-run-fight sleep-sleep-play-eat-smear food in hair-bath-fight bedtime-sleep schedule.

The thought of parenting a newborn leaves me feeling like I'm drowning sometimes. Even though everyone says that there is nothing sweeter than a newborn baby, but I'm not there yet.

But, I always thought that pregnancy would be tough, and I wouldn't cope well with it, but here I am, working into my sixth month of pregnancy, and I've loved every minute of my pregnancy, even through about 19-20 weeks of sickness. He has prepared me to be able to handle pregnancy; He's given me the grace that I've needed to love and embrace this time. From the very moment I found out I was pregnant, my previously negative outlook on pregnancy, changed to a positive belief that God is doing something way bigger than me.

I know with all of my heart, that when the time comes, I will be ready for the newborn that wants to eat all the time, the toddler that has big poop and tantrums, and the 17 year old, that doubles our grocery bill.

He has shown me His gracious, compassionate Father heart, once again. He will not give me more than I can handle.

Cravings

Pregnant women and cravings are synonymous. We've all heard of the lady who had to have beanut butter on her pickles. Or the poor husband who has to go and buy a half gallon of rocky road ice cream, and doesn't get even get a bite after his valiant efforts. Or maybe you've heard of a certain husband, who had to drive across a MN town in a blizzard because his wife just had to have fried chicken drumsticks and egg rolls from the Sunmart deli. But at least he was happy because he got to order himself some mashed potatoes and gravy at this same deli.

My cravings were very strong in the beginning of my pregnancy: cheeseburgers, french fries, fried eggs, pizza, cheese, pickles, sausage, chips, meatballs, HOT wings, Chinese food. All the things I rarely ate before. My aversions were even stronger: salads, fruit, hot cereals, vegetables, sweets, water. All the things I loved and lived on before.

I decided at about 10 weeks pregnant, after an exorbitant weight gain, that even though my body was craving these unhealthy foods and they made my nausea go away, I just couldn't keep eating that way for my health, my baby's health and my sanity. It was mind over matter now. Which mostly worked, as I began to force myself to have healthy meals and snacks. Most of the unhealthy cravings have now subsided, or at least lessened.

But there has been one craving that will not let me be! For almost 5 months now, this is what I want:

BEER.

Yes, beer. No, this isn't Genevieve the Alcoholic talking. No, this isn't a normal craving for me. It's actually quite common with pregnant women. Google it. Normally, I think about having a beer about 4 times a year. When it's hot out, and when I have hot wings.

But not now. I wake up very thirsty, and what do I want? A beer. At 7 am. While I'm about 5 months pregnant. I'm sure not going to win that Mother of the Year Award.

I know many women have an occasional glass of wine or half a beer whilst pregnant, and that most health care providers say there is nothing wrong with that,especially in the second and third trimesters. I know when I told my health care provider that I was craving beer, after she got done laughing at outloud, she said it would be fine for me to have some beer every once in a while. I then asked her about my next alternative, which to me, seemed healthier and more convenient(*gag alert*): non-alcoholic beer. She said that would be more than fine, but wondered if I could even stomach the taste of non-alcoholic beer.

So immediately after that appointment, I went straight to the store and bought this:

So the Sharps's is not very good. The other night I had an O'Doul's, which was WAY better, so I'm just finishing this 12-pack so I can buy me some O'Doul's. Hey, I'm not complaining at all!