You're Two Now, India

You're two now, you know.  Seems like just yesterday your Daddy was saying with tears in his eyes, "Genny, it's a girl!"  I held your little body so close to mine and knew my heart and life were forever changed at that second. I still hold you that close everyday, even though you're two.

Right now, you, my sweet India, are laying on the floor singing "issy bissy 'pider...down came...out came, out came..." and distraction sets in as you talk to your baby Ahna and play the little drum Daddy got you when he was in Ghana.  I ask everyday, "What did you get so big?"  When someone asks you when your birthday is, you respond, "July 8", with a huge smile.

You are so full of joy.  And oh, so sweet.  That is probably the word people use to describe you most often.  Sweet, sweet, sweet.  You laugh and joke and like to tell knock knock jokes.  You're two now.

You're still very sensitive and tender.  You can't handle seeing others hurt, as you will talk about it for days.  Even if someone pretends, it affects you greatly and instantly go to see how you can comfort them.  Such a gift, India, is your compassion.

My view of my babies

You frequently kiss me, hug me, ask me to hold you, and ask to be near me.  In fact, you are never very far from me.  I love my little shadow.

If I get upset with you or you bump into me (or a doll) or if I'm in pain from this pregnancy, you're little voice calls out "Sawwy!"  You say 'sorry' many times a day, most of the time with full sincerity.  I guess you got that from me.

But don't be confused, you will tell exactly what you want and need and desire of others.  After you warm up to someone, you are often overheard bossing them and telling them what to do.  Stay strong, little girl, and keep your heart sensitive to others.   

You say 'hi' and flirt with everyone in the stores, but are quite timid if you're put on the spot or if someone initiates conversation with you.  You still get overwhelmed in large crowds and after a busy few hours, you can be found in the back of your car seat crying, "I wanna STAY HOOOOOME!"

You love swimming (fwimming), playing at the park, being with family, playing with your babies, all your cousins, bubbles, going on walks and doing anything outside.

If you could and if I could, you would love to spend half the day cuddling with me in bed and on the couch while I read you books.  Biscuit books are your favorite and you also enjoy longer stories.  The board books have started to bore you and you love to hear stories from your Bible.  It's because you're two now.

You're still a skinny little thing, with head and hair that seem to overtake a quarter of your body.  You still don't really eat much at meals and if there is ANYTHING distracting you while you are eating, you would rather do that than eat.  You wouldn't even eat all of your cupcake at your birthday party!  You beg for fruit, cereal (sometimes hot, sometimes cold), kefir, vitamins (yes, you cry if you don't get your fish oil), yogurt and candy.  But mostly, you beg for fruit and cereal.  You still only drink water and occasionally will have a glass of goat's milk.

You love shoes - on your feet or on others. Your babies are always near you as you don't really play with many other toys.  Oh, except your books.

In the last few days, all on your own accord, you have decided you are done with diapers.  I love your cute little booty that runs around with underwear too big for your tiny self.  No more diapers.  Hmmph.  That makes you seen really old.  Like, two-year-old old.

Pookie, you are a Mama's girl, but you LOVE your Daddy.  Lately you've been running to him when you're upset or if you need something. Your Daddy is so unbelievably protective, patient and overjoyed with you.  He loves you deeply.

You talk about "baby come out...soon...but not now. I wait."   You randomly and frequently ask to kiss my belly and talk to the baby.  Most of the time, you think this baby will be a girl. You talk about how you will kiss the baby, how you will hold its hand, how you will nurse with the baby and how you will help.  You're two now, you know.

You also have a baby in your tummy.  I'm asked to kiss and hug the baby a lot and told the "baby is kickin'."

Playing the "tiano"

I love you, India Josephine.  Always have, always will.  I'm so proud of the two year old you are and consider it pure joy to be your mama.  I can't wait to see how God uses you to change the world!

Love, Mama

Life is Fragile and Everyday is a Gift

While at times I have understood the phrase "life is fragile and everyday is a gift", lately I haven't been looking at things in that perspective.  I've felt like more of a burden, and I'm tired and haven't been feeling well.  I've felt overwhelmed with all that needs to be done and find myself frustrated.  Poor me, poor me.

On top of that, two dear friends had just announced miscarriages, I was feeling their grief.  Life is fragile.

Sometimes you just need to get away.  After just feeling kind of down and sick of life as we know it, we made a last minute decision to join my family on a little getaway last weekend. 

The first night was just Dallas, India and myself in Cockroach Motel.  Really.  It was.  We planned on just pretty much sleeping there for the night, you know, to limit our bed bug exposure, but I was too sick to do much but lay in bed.  Maybe God's plan was to begin our Sabbath spending hours relaxing in an unknown bed while an 18-month-old used me as her personal gymnastics mat.  We still got to eat at our favorite Thai and Indian restaurants and of course, had to stop at IKEA.  The opportunity to just chill without ministry demands was a blessing. 

India loved that she could press all the TV buttons at Cockroach Motel.  She also loved that she was nekkid.

After that, we joined my parents and my sister and her family in southern Minnesota at a VERY different hotel!  My Dad made sure we all had suites for our families and I swear, some of our family's suites might have been bigger than our house!  Quite the upgrade from VD Motel.  After one day of being away, we were feeling better about life.
 

India and cousin, Xiomara, decided they wanted to play chess.

The kiddie pool here was great, perfect for littles with little fountains and a walk-in.  Best part of all, we were pretty much the only ones in the pools or hot tub! 

India.  Probably bossing someone around.

 
But this getaway wasn't just to get me out of my selfish, little world.  We celebrated Christmas with my Grandma. 

My Grandma, Josephine, India Josephine's namesake and my Dad

This was the first time I've been back to my Grandma's town since my Grandpa's funeral.  It brought back a lot of emotions.  Barely a year earlier, my Grandpa was alive and on the very streets we were on.  He was alive at the house my Grandma now lives in, alone.  I didn't expect to be hit with the reality of how fragile life is.  Sure, my Grandpa was older, but his death was unexpected.  Just one year later, we watch my Grandma come into the hotel alone, without my Grandpa.  Yes, life is fragile and every day is a gift. 

We also went to a benefit fundraiser for my second cousin and her husband.  They were both seriously injured in a motorcycle accident this fall.  Not only are they living miracles, they have both made amazing efforts to walk, move and do daily tasks.  I've never seen SO many people at a benefit.  Just a few months ago, they were working, taking care of their three girls and living life.  One accident has changed the course of their life.  Life is fragile and every day is a gift. 

This weekend was good for some time away.  Some time that was much needed to focus on our families and step back and realize how grateful we are for everything in our lives.  It was a time to see beyond ourselves, to love more, to pray for others, and realize life is fragile and every day is a gift.

As an old high school friend's 3-year-old boy was just diagnosed with stage 4cancer yesterday, this week's lessons that have been taught to me are fresh in my mind.  Enjoy time loving and caring for others.  Take time for refreshing. 

And be grateful for every day, because life is fragile and every day is a gift.